Random Musings

Best Mommy moment of 2008

First of all I want to start with the most WONDERFUL Mommy moment that I've had in a while. I also want to preface that this is the child that I am dealing with constantly right now with disrespect, always wanting things his way, etc. There has been a lot of talking and (ahem) correction the last month or so.
Yesterday evening I was taking something out of the fridge and he came up to me and said (keep in mind that this child is four almost 5 years old)...

T- You're a good Mommy.

Me- Why? How am I a good Mommy.

T- You spank me, you teach me in homeschool, you love me."

He proceeded to throw his little arms around my neck and give me the best hug which I reciprocated of course. :)

While he was eating dinner a little bit later I leaned over and whispered in his ear, "Thomas, you make my heart so happy." He replied, "You make mine happy too."


Personal Reflection

I have noticed that when I am irritated/angry with one person that I am irritated/angry with everyone. I don't compartmentalize that very well. I have realized of late that when I do that I am actually obeying my emotions instead of the Holy Spirit. Example: if I get mad at person A then I will be VERY likely to snap at person B. At that point I am letting my emotions lead and not God. I realized this a little while ago and am trying to get better at recognizing when I start to get upset at someone and NOT let my emotions lead me or obey them; but obey God instead and treat others with love. It's a work in progress.


It REALLY WORKS!!!

Tonya has told her secret before about how she deals with the whole monster issue in her house. Our first child has struggled HORRIBLY with fear. Most definitely more in a spiritual sense than normal childhood fear. This monster thing NEVER worked with him. Thomas, on the other hand, is going through NORMAL 4 year old fear of monsters in the closet right now. So, last night I employed Tonya's secret weapon.
I waded through Tonya's archives but I'm tired now so I will give those of you who are my family the general gist. But FULL CREDIT goes to Tonya Kissack (the Tonya on my sidebar).

Thomas- MOMMY!

Me- Yes honey.

T- I'm SCARED. (He really did look scared.)

Me- What are you scared of.

T- I think that there is a monster in my closet.

Me- Oh, well let me check.

(You can tell from his next reaction that he FULLY expected me to proclaim that the closet was monster free.)

Me- (after checking) OH! There IS a monster in here. You were right.

(He looked like he was going to FREAK OUT! You should have seen his eyes. They were SO WIDE. Judah sat straight up in bed and looked nervous too.)

Me- (looking back at the open closet) Monster, you have fleas! We cannot have fleas in our house. You need to go outside. (pause) What is that you are saying Mr Monster?

Me- (To Thomas in a compassionate voice) T, he says that it's VERY cold outside and he would really like to stay the night in the closet. He is a NICE monster and he WON'T do ANYTHING to hurt you. Can he please stay?

T- Sure. (pause and smile) He can sleep on my bad with me if he wants to.

Thomas indicates a spot at the foot of the bed. We go through the elaborate show of making him a place to sleep and I lifted the "monster" out of the closet and placed him in Thomas' bed. Thomas smiled and laid down. As soon as I was finished Judah said, "I want one too!" So we went through the thing again (minus the part where I told the "Monster" to sleep outside." As soon as I was done, lo and behold, Gideon (who's 2) grunted and smiled and gestured that he wanted one too. (which I thought was funny because it was entirely make believe. He's got an amazing ability at his young age to pretend play.) So, they all went to sleep happily and with no more trouble.
As I was tucking Thomas is tonight he said. "Mommy get the monster out of my closet. He can sleep NEXT to me in bed tonight." heehee
No fear. No anxiety. AND, he wasn't begging us to come with him everywhere in the house tonight. THANK-YOU TONYA! You really are a GENIUS!!!!!!


MY HUSBAND

I don't think I can sit next to my husband in church anymore. He's just too much fun. He had me choking back giggles during the whole service. (even communion- which normally we act very serious for FYI) What a great guy!


Blogging Pet Peeve

Why do people continually read others' blog that they TOTALLY don't agree with and leave combative/scathing comments on them? Good grief. These aren't required reading folks! If some one's opinion makes you that angry...DON'T READ IT EVERY DAY!! :):):)
Now, I do read blogs that I don't always agree with. I read blogs that challenge me. I also read blogs that I love. However, the only ones I leave combative comments on are friends' blogs who don't mind having a good debate every now and then, or a stranger who I feel is way out of line- but the stranger thing has been VERY VERY rare. Usually I don't comment and I stop reading the blog if I notice it frustrates me every day. Weird. I just don't get people sometimes.

My "Baby"

Gideon is 26 1/2 months old and still only says about 7 words- none of them in 2 word sentences. It's SO strange. His hearing is perfect. His comprehension is ASTOUNDING for his age. His obedience level is also high for his age. It's baffling. I think I have been partly to blame. I realized that I don't actually require him to say words very often. LOL
Judah (our firstborn) was VERY VERY strong willed. Thomas was very whiny. So both of those boys were immediately checked when they asked for something inappropriately. Gid, on the other hand, doesn't whine very often, doesn't throw very many fits, doesn't fuss too much. He smiles sweetly and you want to give him the world. He can make you understand what he wants without language. We are starting to make him try to talk but he isn't imitating the words very well. We have ordered the Baby Bumblebee Bee DVD set for kids with language delays and autistic kids (Gid is NOT autistic. It's just used for both autistic AND language delayed kids.) I'll update y'all when we start the series. It's going to take a few weeks to get here. :) Please pray for us occasionally concerning this. We have just been really laid back about it and figured that he would talk when he was ready but that doesn't seem to be happening. So, onto the Baby Bumblebee set. Hopefully that will kick start him because he really is very smart. :)

PROGRESS NOT PERFECTION

Today at church our older boys' teacher said that she had to put J in time out for kicking/pushing a couple of kids. I immediately thought, "That's weird. He doesn't ever do that anymore at church." We do deal with it at home but he hasn't had a problem with that in church for a long time. I don't even remember the last time that was an issue.
Later I smiled to myself and then asked Michael, "Wasn't it wonderful when we heard about Judah's behavior to think- that's weird; instead of sighing and thinking- that's normal (which would have been true 18 months ago)? He smiled and said, "Yes!"

Hey, for me, seeing any progress is good. lol It keeps me going.

My new Mommy mantra is "progress not perfection".
Don't get me wrong. I would love to see perfection in my kids. But since all kids have a sinful nature I just have to keep plugging away, correcting the behavior as it comes up, redirecting them to their Source of help, and know that progress is happening even when it's slow.
And yes, Judah was corrected at home too. :)

Progress not Perfection.

Blessings!
Angela :)