CLUTTER

To quote Tonya...it really does "suck the life out of you!!" The funny part (not funny haha but funny ironic) is that I used to be such a clutter bug too. Saving things is still important to me but my sanity is slowly becoming more and more important. It didn't bother me so much with child #1 and #2 but when #3 came along it was like, "WHOA!! Time to cut back somewhere and clutter needs to go." When things are cluttered I feel like I'm in constant state of unrest. I feel like I always need to be cleaning instead of playing with the kiddos. It causes me to be more irritable because everywhere I look there are little piles of things screaming at me, "PUT ME WHERE I BELONG OR THROW ME OUT!!!" Combine this with the fact that I have a 20 month old, who can demolish a room in no time flat, my sanity is slowly evaporating away. LOL Not really but I have discovered 2 things about why I think clutter sucks the life out of people....



#1. You never feel like you can rest because there is always work to do.



#2. Cluttered rooms make people in general feel more stressed. Neat, clean rooms (not stark mind you) are much more relaxing to look at.





So here's why I think even those of us who are clutterbugs by nature tend to change some after we have multiple children...



If you are a clutterbug and able to handle stress it doesn't bother you when you are growing up (I could barely find the floor in my room most of the time. My drawers were full of papers and stuff that I had saved.) and in marriage because some stress in life is normal. It may not even bother you after 1 or 2 children but the more kids you have the more stress you have. [I don't mean that kids are a burden. I LOOOOOVE being a Mommy but there is a certain amount of stress that comes with raising kids. Especially if you have one, or more (as is our case) strong willed kiddos.] Then, throw your own business into the mix and there is even more stress present. So, since I can't (and WOULDN'T) eliminate our children and I can't eliminate our business I turn to the stress inducer that I CAN eliminate. CLUTTER. Begone clutter!! LOL Have a great night everyone!

Blessings!!

Quick Story From Today

Do you ever have those days where you observe the behavior of your children and think to yourself, "I must not be doing ANYTHING right?"



Do you ever have those days when you see something good growing in their hearts and you think, "Well, I'm either doing SOMETHING right or God is just downloading things to him, or maybe it's a mix?"



I had a little of both today. This morning I was watching and interacting with my kids and thinking that I must be totally failing as a parent. Later this evening we took our kids to their first football practice. They actually didn't practice. The coaches divided up the teams and they chatted a little with the kids. While they were dividing up the teams amongst themselves the kids were supposed to stand against the fence and be patient. Let me remind you that this is a group of 20-30 BOYS ages 4 and 5. LOL Some of the boys were climbing up the fence, running and kicking the fence, slamming into the fence, etc. The coaches DID take what seemed like a LONG time to get their teams squared away on paper before they called the kids. What were my kids doing during that waiting time....(this is going to shock most of you) they were actually standing by the fence being relatively patient. They tried to climb a couple of times but we said no and they stopped. Whoa! At one point I said to our boys, "Be patient guys!" A father standing next to me laughed and pointed out their ages. I thought to myself, "I really do expect my kids to be patient." (not for 1/2 hour or anything but at least for 15 or so minutes) I'm SOOOO glad that for years I had moms and dads around me who expected things from their kids that the world would call "unreasonable" but that they called attainable. I learned a lot from them.

That's not even the best part of the story....(this WON'T shock you as most of you know that Judah and Thomas are TOTALLY devoted to their little brother Gideon)



At one point (they had been standing at the fence for quite awhile by this time) Gideon, who was running around in the grass next to Michael and I, took off running for the gate to go into the dugout and out of the field we were in. I was talking to another mom and Michael was watching Gideon. Michael knew exactly where Gid was and started after him but he was BEATEN by, not one, but BOTH of our older boys running after the baby to bring him back to us. It was SOOO SWEEET!!! The other mom commented on how great that was that they both went to get him. I told her that usually when we are outside I'm telling them to watch Gideon, make sure he doesn't wander off, and make sure he stays out of the road. (in case he moves while my back is turned. He's so FAST!) The boys are SO protective and loving towards him. This morning we found a wound on his thumb that looked a little "angry". It was in an obscure location so I had missed it during baths, etc. Plus he NEVER complained about it. He fussed during the hydrogen peroxide treatment. (as LOTS of bubbles bubbled up) Judah was next to me while I was cleaning it, putting Neosporin on it, and bandaging it. After I was through he asked if he could carry Gideon back to the living room. I told him sure. As he was carrying him he was crooning softly to him, "I don't like when you're hurt Gid. I don't like it when you get hurt." I was such a beautiful sight. Maybe we're not doing everything wrong after all....or maybe we are and the Holy Spirit is working overtime. LOL



Ok so that was 2 stories but you have to admit they were worth the read. Fine, don't admit it but I liked them. :P Goodnight all!

BLESSINGS!- Angela :)

I'm Still Alive

Hello everyone!! I'm sorry that it's been a week since my last entry. Whew! Where has the week gone???? OH, that's right! Cleaning, homeschool, taking care of kids, cooking, etc.

Here is what the new schedule looks like...

7:30- Wake up and nurse Gideon.
(YES! MY CHILDREN HAVE FINALLY LEARNED TO SLEEP PAST 5:30 or 6:00am so I'm not going to set an alarm for now. I'm enjoying this after 5 years of waking up TOO early for my body.) The boys bring Gideon to me and I just nurse him while trying to wake up. It's so nice. Yesterday they came down the stairs and showed me that they had even dressed him. He was wearing one of Judah's shirts. "I shared Mommy!" SO sweet. What was even cuter was the song they made up and were singing to him as they came into the room. It was something about a superbaby. I wish I had been awake enough to get the videon camera but it was in the basement and I wasn't feeling that spunky yet.

Ok, back to the schedule....

8:00-8:30- Boys watch Flying House on TV while I exercise.

8:30 - breakfast

8:45ish- (cereal doesn't take very long) clean up and start chores. The chores depend on the day. I have them broken up so that no day is overwhelming.

Btwn 9:30 and 10:00- start school
Subjects depend on the day.

Mondays- Reading/language arts (for Judah, phonics for Thomas) and writing letters (both)

Tuesdays- Math (they are both on beginning addition) and writing numbers

Wednesdays-Reading and History (we're reading out of an old school book of my mom's and sometimes we act out what we have learned. Right now we're studying American Indians.)

Thursdays- Math and Geography (learning the states slowly)

Fridays- This differs from week to week. We are going to purchase a science and a social studies curriculum probably at the end of this year. For now it includes whatever we need to work on and sometimes a science experiment, etc. Sometimes we skip Fridays. Since we go through the summer we will still be OK on the 180 days thing.

We finish up between 11:00am and 12:00am
Then we usually go outside until time for lunch. Or, we fix lunch if it's already 12:00.

btwn 12:30 and 1:00pm- start naps. (Judah just rests for 1-2 hours) This is when I take my break. I try NOT to do any work during naps. I need a break by that point. This is my down time. I usually try to eat lunch during this time so at least once per day I can eat a meal in peace. LOL This is also the time where I spend time with God (when I remember- sad isn't it), blog, or sleep. It varies from day to day.


They wake up btwn 2:00 and 3:00 and it's outside till time to make dinner.

It's flexible enough to accommodate breakfast going longer (and it usually does) and also we can go longer or shorter depending on what we need to do with school. Next year when we "officially" begin we will have to fill 4 1/2 hours a day with school (according to the law). I guess we will be doing lots of projects and add music and art to the mix (Bible will be added in a few weeks. I'm writing my own lessons for that.) We certainly don't need to make Language or Math take longer. Judah is already about 1 - 1 1/2 grades ahead and Thomas is already doing Kindergarten work in Phonics and first grade work in Math. (he's only 4) We'll go on lots of nature walks and field trips etc.
Well I gotta go. Breakfast is supposed to be over and I need to get them started. LOL

BLESSINGS!

I JUST HAD THE BEST MORNING!

We spent all morning working on learning how to count MONEY. Since the boys are making a little money here and there I thought it was about time to teach them how to count it. Plus, it will just reinforce the whole counting by 1s, 5s, and 10s that we learned during school in the last 2 weeks. Judah (almost without help) cna now count to 100 by 1s, 5s, and 10s. Thomas can do it with a fair amount of prompting. (I don't worry about him though since he's only 4.)



So, I raided Michael's money jar and set out 100 pennies, 10 dimes, 20 nickles, 4 quarters and a dollar bill. Then we learned how to count each type of coin up to a dollar. We then played games where I would give them a coin and tell them to find the equal amount using other coins. They did pretty well, with some help of course. :):) After that we opened up their workbooks to the money section and Judah and Thomas did 7 and 4 pages respectively.

When they were finished they took off upstairs for a short TV break and I got to play with the MOST ADORABLE toddler on the planet who had just spent the morning in his new playpen next to us. (We tossed him some toys every once in a while and talked to him when he got fussy.) Gid and I played ball, tickle, chase, and cover the toddler with kisses.

It was a great morning. Now for the afternoon....exercise, clean bathrooms, shower, get the kids outside, and dinner. WHEW! I'd better get started!



Blessings!- Angela :)

Practical Choring

It seems the idea of chores is a hot topic these days with questions like; "When should I start my kids doing chores? How good of a job can I expect them to do? How much is too much? Should I give an allowance?" I thought I would throw my non-professional 2-5 cents in, since this IS my blog and all...LOL Please remember, these are my opinions. Everyone needs to do what they feel is best for their kids/family. I do respect families who do it differently. This is meant to show one way to do it. :):)

My definition of chores: normal work around the house, common jobs that are necessary for life.

1. When should I start my kids doing chores?
Whenever they are physically able to put away toys. Chores are not looked at as work in the beginning. Judah was 9 months old when he started helping me with the laundry. He would sit at the basket and hand me the clothes to fold. I realized that he thought we were playing. I thought to myself that this would be a great way to introduce all jobs in the future. (at least for a few years anyway) When they can walk they can put toys away. One year olds can certainly pick up toys. You will of course have to help them for a while and IMHO it helps to cheer for them when they are first learning. :):):) (Plus, cheering is fun. ) I always just let my kids help with what they could while I was working. Then, we were together and they were learning. ( You should have seen how excited my kids were when I told them they could dust. )

2. How good of a job can I expect them to do?
It depends on their age. I strive to teach my kids to do an excellent job. This means (most of the time) telling them to check the floor carefully to see if they missed anything, etc. They know to be thorough in their tasks. They also know they will have to finish. Sometimes I help them finish. If you have a child who tends to be overwhelmed with large tasks, break them up into a series of small tasks (or piles) so that they can feel a sense of accomplishment after each section. That should help motivate them to finish. In the beginning it will be more work for you to have them help but it will be invaluable later that you let them help at an early age. If you wait till they are able to help you without it being extra work for you then it will probably be a battle to get them to work. If you start them early they will probably not think of it so much as work but instead realize that this is just what a family does.

3. How much is too much?
It depends on the individual child. When they are exhausted or their eyes glaze over- they are done. LOL

4. Should I give an allowance?

This can be argued from both sides. I am not arguing. I think allowances can be a good way to teach money management (ie: tithing, saving, giving, spending). This is just to explain why we don't.

We are not paying our kids for jobs that come with being part of a family. Dusting, vacuuming, cleaning bathrooms, etc. are part of living in a house and are not things adults get paid for. I also remember the discussions I had in public school with friends who got allowances. Sometimes it can spur on that OBNOXIOUS "entitlement mentality". Or, you can have a child expecting to be paid for something they should be doing out of love and respect for the others they live with. My dad always had a lecture he gave me when I would ask for an allowance (I grew up without one.)...Honey, I pay your rent, your food bill, and your clothing bill. I don't charge you anything for those things...etc. etc. etc.

We do pay our children for work they do for our business. That's outside work and they should get paid for it. That's when we teach tithing, saving, giving, and spending.

One last thing...

We don't have a chore chart yet at our house. For now I still just have them help me with whatever chores I am doing. I make the guest bed and they make the master bed, they dust and I vacuum, we unload the dishwasher together, etc. It's time I can spend bonding with them and it really is fun to work all together. It helps that "part of a family" mentality. "WORKING TOGETHER WE GET THE JOB DONE!"

Sorry, just couldn't resist the little Bob the Builder song. My boys love that one. :):)

Gotta go exercise. :):)

Blessings!- Angela :)

Back To Homeschool Day 1

"What Led to Our Decision to Homeschool?"

It started out with Michael telling me as soon as we were married that he wanted to homeschool. I was totally against it for all the same reasons any non informed person is. Mostly I didn't see the need for it. I thoroughly enjoyed public school (ok not the kids but all the extra curricular activities) I also enjoyed being a light in the darkness for Jesus.

The only experience I had had with homeschooled kids were my friends from church whose parents pulled them out of public school in Jr high/High school and they were MISERABLE!!

Of course going to Grace Covenant and being around lots and lots of homeschooled kids changed my mind. Also the decline of the culture and the things they "teach" in school now are other reasons why I'm glad we homeschool but the real reason we homeschool is that we feel that's what God led US to do for OUR family. :):) The bonuses are that I get to hang out with my kids more, I get to teach them to read, we get to cheer really loudly for someone when they finally get something. I could go on and on. I'm REALLY glad we are homeschooling. I know I would be one of those moms who would cry every day because my baby was off being raised by someone else. :):)

We plan on continuing to homeschool all the way through their education unless God tells us otherwise.

Blessings!- Angela :)

ignore all the grammatical and punctuation mistakes please...it's late.

Back To Homeschool Day 2

"How Do You Homeschool?"











I am in the midst of a Scheduling change. Right now we concentrate on Reading, Writing, and Arithmetic. We don't have any curriculum but have gathered things here and there.





Judah is going through a huge first grade book from Walmart. That has actually been a great springboard. He is reading the Dick and Jane books. (my mom's when she was little) We are working on counting to 100 and beginning basic math concepts. We practice writing letters and numbers with both boys. Thomas is going through the same workbook as Judah but is at the beginning instead of the middle. It took him awhile to learn his sounds. I am VERY relaxed with Thomas about homeschooling since he is only 4 and wouldn't even be in kindergarten till next year. I recently started History with them and Thomas can tell you that "Mister" Leif discovered America first and then "Mister" Columbus discovered it again later.





We also work on colors and shapes and all that fun stuff. We color and practice staying in the lines to improve handwriting skills. They cut and paste in their workbooks. :):) We have lots of fun.





We don't follow a strict schedule but as I said I am in the process of tweaking it. So...I will update y'all on that in a week or two.

Oh and we also do fun hands-on things like our garden. The boys know that you need water, sun, and soil to grow things. They have enjoyed our garden adventure. We ate our first cucumber yesterday. :):) Judah commented how "fresh" it tasted.

We go on hikes and practice counting while we walk.

We went to the zoo for school yesterday and read about the different things animals eat.

I hope the kids are having as much fun as I am. :):):)

Blessings- Angela :)

Back To Homeschool Day 3

"Getting Out There"

Well, I don't worry much about the socialization thing because I have 3 boys very close in age. :):)

The boys attend a Sunday School class where they are with children their own age. They also attend the Awana program at our church.

Recently we signed them up for Football. This will be a new thing this year and they are SOOOOOOOOOOOOO EXCITED!! So that will be a chance to see how they interact with all different kinds of children.

We have been very careful who they have played with since they were little. Judah had tendencies toward selfishness and anger, and Thomas tends to go with whatever anyone else is doing (good or bad) so we have been trying to create a good foundation for them these last 5 and 4 years respectively. recently we were watching a program where one of the characters did something "bad". I can't remember what it exactly was. I think it might have been yelling. Judah looked at me and said something like, "We see it but we don't want to be like that." It was encouraging. :):)

We do get out of the house. They play outside a lot. We go to the park and the beach where Thomas usually interacts with other kids. (Judah is more drawn to adults) They can carry on conversations with whoever, so I'm not worried. :): )

Blessings!- ADL

So Far Behind...

...not in life, just in blogging. I was taking a 3 day break at the first of the week. Then, life just got a little crazy. :):)

I wanted to do the Back To Homeschool Week that Susannah is doing on her blog. So, I am writing 4 posts (ordered backwards) so I can at least convey my thoughts on the subjects, even if this is only our first year. I laugh because everyone has started school this week but we started in the spring...so I guess my blogs should be Continuation of Homeschool...LOL

Back to Homeschool Week: Day Four

"If I Had Only Known"

If I had only known how much fun this would be I would not have been so anti homeschooling 8 years ago. :P

We are really having fun. I am able to buy little games and flashcards to make learning fun for them. The internet is loaded with hands on science experiments and great sites like starfall.com.

A little off topic but just a cute story from today. I took the boys down to Dollar Tree this morning because they had earned a couple dollars last week working for Michael. They spent about 25 minutes looking carefully through the toys. They were doing so well (not wrestling in the aisle, not fighting, not snatching, etc. etc. etc. ) that I went a couple of aisles over to get a few homeschool things. When they had finished they came up to the counter and Thomas paid for his toy. The cashier said, " I would have thought they'd be in school?" He looked confused not critical. I replied, "We homeschool so (grin) they technically are." He smiled and commented on how well mannered they were. (He should have followed us on to Walmart and he would have taken the compliment back. LOL ) Anyway I was proud of them because they did do a good job and I'm glad the gentleman pointed it out because frankly I didn't notice. I guess it's what I have always expected them to do even if they usually don't. Practice makes perfect. (and since we're at Walmart "all" the time we get plenty of practice)

Blessings,

Angela :)

I Just Wanted To Say

While my last post seemed harsh and graceless it really wasn't. I certainly don't want parents beating themselves up because they can't attain perfect parenting. None of us can and I CERTAINLY can't!!! (believe me I've tried)

I just wanted to give a little word of encouragement that the Holy Spirit gave me a few years ago when I myself was caught in the striving mode....

"Do what you can in love; instead of trying to do everything perfectly in anger."

Once I (mostly) got out of the striving mode I was able to start moving toward excellence without the condemnation.

That's all I was basically saying. Keep working toward excellence without the burden of perfectionism. :):)

Blessings!- Angela :)

DON'T SETTLE!!

I am a bit fired up about this so bear with me. :):)



I've been reading a blog recently where the mother is learning a lot. It really seems like the Lord is challenging her to reach to new heights in Godly parenting and also in her personal life. What I have found a little disturbing are the comments that are left after her posts.



One such post was about having higher expectations for our children than society does. Society's expectations of obedience are, shall we say- WEAK!

I thought her thoughts about having a higher standard were right on the money. It was thought provoking and challenging.

Some of the comments she received were from people talking about having grace for ourselves as parents and not trying to be perfectionistic. One even said, "You are a super mommy just for being concerned about this issue." Nice statement but is it really true? I mean of course it's true that super mommies think about those issues but if we just THINK about them and are CONCERNED about them does that make us better parents because we are THINKING about things. Of course not. It's putting things into practice that counts.

In her post today she was noticing (like we ALL do) that some of her daughter's character flaws seem to be just like hers. One of the comments was, " Don't blame yourself so much--you are doing the best you are able to be and that's good enough. "

I'm not saying that we shouldn't encourage each other and I'm CERTAINLY not saying that perfection is attainable and that we should beat ourselves up for not being more Godly parents; but let's not stop at just contemplating going deeper with ourselves and deeper in our parenting. Let's DO IT!! With perfection- heavens no; with grace- absolutely.



Remember- even if you don't accomplish it perfectly just work steadily toward excellence. Then, when/if you fail you will just move on and keep trying instead of feeling like a failure and giving up.



OK those are my thoughts for the night. :):):)

Blessings and happy parenting!!

-Angela :)

Gideon's Greatness

Speaking of MENSA...lol



I just wanted to tell you a little bit about our Little Bit...heeheee I know, I know- GROAN! I'll stop...maybe.



ANYWAY, he is our third child and also our third BOY. All of our children have different personalities as well as different temperments and character strengths and weaknesses; just like all families everywhere. Judah is a WONDERFUL helper and he can outwork some adults I know. (really) Thomas has a tendency to be lazy on the work side. He is a very compassionate people person but if you ask him to do a job he will usually balk. (Not for long because we expect him to work aka chores a little every day but he will still try to get out of it. )

Anyway, Judah has always wanted to help. I remember that I used to set him next to the laundry basket when he was 9 months old and he would hand me the laundry to fold. He has been a wonderful worker ever since. Part of the reason is that, to him, it's a relationship thing. I know that he enjoys spending time with Michael or me and if he has to work to spend more time with us then that's fine with him. Work is a bonding thing for him and that's just fine with me -obviously!! LOL That said Judah doesn't always take the initiative to do a job. He just doesn't tend to complain when given one.

Anyway, so we had one worker and one dreamer.

Along comes Gideon...

He started showing signs early that he didn't want to be left out of anything. He always wanted to be in the center of the chaos at our house. He started showing signs early that we would have another fabulous worker. I was really excited. That's at least one thing we won't have to work on an attitude about. LOL So, we noticed that he would always go to the broom closet, take out the broom, and begin sweeping. It was really cute. As he got older I noticed that he would take baby wipes and start wiping the floor or the table off for me. What TOTALLY blew me away was a few weeks ago just after he turned 19 months old. He was walking through the living room and saw a piece of paper on the floor. It was crumpled. He picked it up. He then went straight to the kitchen, opened the garbage can, threw it in and shut the lid. I stood amazed and thought, "That must have just been a fluke!" Since then I have seen him repeat that action. He takes the initiative to clean. I think any 19 month old that does this is amazing. :):) (to me anyway)

He is not saying too many intelligeble words yet but I'm not worried. He's a boy. He signs to tell me what he wants and also he says enough sounds to let me know what it is he is trying to communicate; punctuated by large hand jestures and pointing. LOL

Another reason that I am not worried about his slower speech is because he seems to have the ability to understand even adult conversations. For example...

The other day the boys took Michael's car keys. (Well we assumed it was them anyway because it wasn't either of us.) I was holding Gideon and Michael was talking about needing his keys. I was telling him that the boys must have taken them. All of a sudden, Gid started to get really excited; squealing and pointing. It didn't register to me for a few seconds what he was so excited about. Then I realized, and told Michael, that I thought Gideon was trying to tell us where the keys were. I set him down and he immediately ran off with a huge smile. We followed him because, even if it was going to be a fruitless search, Gideon is adorable to watch. LOL Gideon ran through the entry way, and started up the stairs. Then he pointed and squealed. Sure enough, either Judah or Thomas left them on the stairs. We were amazed, and pleased. I made some comment like, "Gideon the bloodhound." :):):)

Because he understands more than I remember the other boys understanding we have to remember to specifically address the person we are giving a command or request to. Two quick examples...#1- The other day I had just HAD it with the two older boys. I hollered out, "Sit down in the chairs!!" (The chairs I was referring to are the entry way chairs I set the boys in so that they can calm down if they are acting like wild men.)

Judah got in one and then I noticed Gideon with large protruding lip was trying to climb into the other one. It about broke my heart. I picked him up, kissed that adorable lip, smiled and told him he was doing fine and explained that I wanted Thomas and Judah to sit down. The lip went away and I was rewarded with a huge smile. #2- The other day Michael was going to take just Thomas on some errands with him. He told him, "Go get your shoes on." Gideon immediately went to retrieve his shoes." It was a sad moment when Michael had to explain to him that he was talking to Thomas. Poor baby. So quick to obey and everything. :):) :)

He is the most amusing thing in our household. We (all of us including our dog) adore him. We praise God for ALL our precious boys!

Blessings!- Angela :)